The child's cry at the beginning of kindergarten

2023-09-11 22:14:00, Sociale CNA

When the child goes to kindergarten for the first time, it is natural to cry and it should cry.

Going to kindergarten is a big event for the life of the child and also for the mother, because the process of being two separate individuals, that is, two different people, is becoming concrete. Mother and child are two different people.

This process is not an easy process, as the mother herself refuses it. The mother herself does not love and does not develop this kind of awareness. Of course, she doesn't do it on purpose, but she sees her child as a child and not another person who can exist without him.

However, it is also not an easy thing to trust someone with the child, and moreover, for hours. For hours, the mother should not have any kind of physical and personal contact with the child. The feeling provoked by this "missing time" between mother and child creates anxiety, uncertainty and confusion in the souls of both.

The child demonstrates it by crying and the mother with guilt and distrust. It is up to the professionals, that is, the educators, to reassure the mother and the child with the security that the profession gives and not by prejudging or being annoyed by the mother's insecure and confused attitude.

Also, the child's crying is a natural reaction, since he is being separated from his mother, who is everything to him, and will be in a foreign environment with unknown people. Even in this case, the educators with their professionalism must calm the child down within an hour, giving him the right to cry, since he does not know them and, moreover, they are not midwives, "but the mommy has carefully chosen the place where she wants to trust her child" and he or she will soon feel this.

By singing and playing various games, a new universe will begin to develop in the child, which combines him, only in the kindergarten, without the presence of the mother. The only child builds relationships with this new environment.

In this new environment, i.e. in the kindergarten, under the guidance of educators, he will learn how to play with his peers, practicing speech, words, hands and above all his mind, and so far so good. However, what is a problem when the child starts kindergarten is our outdated tradition. In our tradition, the child is treated as a child, who does not hear or understand, and not as a growing person.

So, since he is small and doesn't understand, we cut him short, we lie to him, so that he doesn't understand that mom has run away and, adding the expressions: rest, did you tell the police or did I call the doctor to do the needle and, no ends here, this so-called "dialogue", becomes loud and very harsh.

This is the problem, our way of treating children, i.e. adults. We treat kindergarten as a place where mothers leave their children because there is no one to take care of them, and not as the foundation stage of the organization of language, mind and thought. This way of treating the child at this age leaves a lot to be desired, as we still have not taken it seriously and we do not appreciate this fundamental age for the human being.