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SPAK investigates empty beaches?!

2024-07-15 18:57:00, Opinione Lutfi Dervishi

SPAK building

Why are our beaches left behind the Maldives empty these days as if Covid is back? Are the prices? Services? With few vacationers from Kosovo or the conspiracy of foreign services that have launched a large-scale disinformation campaign as was said today in Parliament?

1. Prices

Imagine, if you can on these hot days, a beach in the South of the country, that has a daily rate so high that it looks like you're not going on vacation, but taking part in an auction. Prices have soared that sand has been imported from the moon, sunlight has to be paid for like lasers in a hospital, while umbrella shade is so precious it's worth taking out a consumer loan!

2. Services.

After getting a (micro)loan to afford the beach tent, prepare for the service. But if you lack patience, don't go on vacation! Beach restaurants are known for their incredible speed – lunch can arrive just before sunset.

3. Exodus of patriots

Meanwhile, vacationers from Kosovo, until yesterday called patriotic tourists, today have discovered beaches that are not only cheaper, but also with better service. Greece, Montenegro, Turkey welcome them with open arms, leaving our South as lonely as the English team after losing the European Championship.

4. Sabotage

As if the high prices and poor service weren't enough, now we are in front of a conspiracy. According to some deputies, the abandoned beaches are not because of prices and services, but we are facing a malignant campaign by foreign intelligence services. It is clear that the last mission of the KGB, Asfalise, SIM and BIA is that no one enjoys the sun's rays in Dhermi or a shadow of an umbrella in Jale!

A majority MP today, with the zeal of a detective in a horror movie, asked SPAK to investigate this unprecedented act of sabotage the country is facing. Are foreign agents spreading misinformation to discourage tourists? Is there a secret plot to undermine our traditional hospitality? How is it possible for tourists to be surprised by the prices of goods in supermarkets that are more expensive than in EU countries? How is it possible that the lek is stronger than the euro, the pound and the Swiss franc?

Before this question, the Head of SPAK, froze on the podium of the Assembly, perhaps asking himself: how could we have escaped such a big conspiracy affair? In this case, it seems that even Sherlock Holmes would be left without a text.

5. Epilogue:

Why are our beaches empty? Until we solve this mystery, the beaches of the South will remain a testament to the stupidity and the KÇK (catch what you can catch) mentality in tourism and the propaganda of the 10 million tourists who are fascinated by Albania./ CNA