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Violence, fear and torture, are we killing the girls?

2024-08-12 07:26:00, Opinione CNA

Violence, fear and torture, are we killing the girls?

Journalist Glidona Daci

A text message arrived on my phone, somewhere around 23:00, a little while ago. An acquaintance of mine was very worried, the message read "Glid will kill her, please do something, notify the police" and she sent me a video, which I watched, the images were terrible, a human being, who calls himself "man" he was abusing the woman, psychological violence is more than physical violence. All this terrible scene was happening in the eyes of a minor child, who had nothing else to do except hug his mother and cry. The scenes were terrible, a "father" who was abusing the woman, the mother of the child, in the presence of the latter. I couldn't understand what was the reason for the argument?

The videos from my acquaintance were filmed from afar. She told me that this situation had been repeating itself for several days. I immediately notified the police, specifically a friend of mine who works in one of the police stations in Tirana. Immediately, the group of blue uniforms started, to possibly prevent a possible incident. On the other hand, my acquaintance was watching every movement that happened in that house with the doors and balcony open. He informed me about everything, at the moment when the police arrived below the apartment, he twisted the arm of the woman, who was lying with the child who was hugging her, a howl is heard, that tears the flesh, then the child's cry, which is unable to help the mother.

The police ran to the apartment and entered by force, since no one was opening the door. At that moment, the "man" of the house disappeared, while the young woman confronted the police, who informed her that they had received information about domestic violence. She denied it, she told you that it was not true, nothing was happening in her house, she claimed that she was asleep, while the police officers had heard her scream. The discussion continued, the woman denied everything, refused to file a report, after the police, according to the procedures, they took that "man" and accompanied her as they had evidence that he was abusing the woman. Until that moment, I didn't even have time to think, as I wanted to help that woman and the child.

After the "man" was escorted to the respective police station and my acquaintance calmed down. I started thinking about this whole situation and my eyes filled with tears. I started to cry, because I couldn't understand why a mother, a daughter, a woman, reaches the point of accepting violence, be it physical or psychological (which unfortunately happens a lot). I thought, that woman feels scared for tomorrow, to face the future, to raise the child, or no one supports her, or she is alone in this world, abandoned even by her family, who can They also tell you that "the man even beats you" or they can tell you that "we can't keep you, we can't help you, I'll find the solution myself" while I was thinking, I couldn't come to a clear final conclusion. There are many things that are connected together, first we as a society point the finger of accusation at everyone, judge and prejudice them, but without knowing any reason.

In our families, we grew up with the idea that "the man is always right" "the brother is right" "you have a brother you have to serve" "learn to do the work because you will go to your husband tomorrow" so that something was ingrained in us from a young age such, most of us have not been able to get out of that vicious circle that they have entered since they were created.

I don't blame anyone's mother here, she most likely was violated for herself, she knew as much as she gave. Dear parents, support your child, don't let your daughter trample a boy, whoever he is. A woman is not a man's property, dear mothers, educate your sons, teach them compassion and love for the opposite sex, and don't pamper them by telling you that he is a "man" and can do whatever he wants. For the rest of you who hide behind the keyboard and throw mud at anyone who comes before you in the holy books it says "let the one who has sinned cast the first stone". A lot of bile and poison are thrown at everyone, don't judge girls and women, let everyone live their own life, judge people based on the relationship they have with you, not on other things.

None of us knows what the other has been through. As a popular proverb says "wear my shoes, live my life and then judge me". I still have those images in my mind, the cry of that woman, who refused to call, why? Haven't we turned into a society that kills women, girls and anyone who comes before us? I still haven't erased that image from my memory./ CNA